I know I don’t get to vote for or against you despite being subject of a vassal state of the US, but then the same applies to some of your own citizens in certain overseas territories. Nevertheless I hope you enjoyed the authentic show you were offered at Schloß Elmau in Bavaria, the expensive place named after a sympathetic sesame street character.
Clearly this must be Germany as Germany is supposed to be according to the usual American stereotypes of Germany. Lederhosen1, a huge glass of beer, pretzels and happiness all around.
I hope all attendants were either vetted not to know even the basics of English or at least to be sufficiently pro-US, if they knew English. In general I hope that your excellency didn’t hear any voices of dissent as we Germans don’t want to come across as anything other than subservient lackeys of the empire.
No one would dare to compare the situation at Elmau to the merry round your run-of-the-mill dictator would put together during a G8 summit in Sotchi, say, and far away from any protesters while he and his buddies continue to disregard the rule of law, human rights and spies on the citizenry.
We’re the good guys!
- leather trousers [↩]